[9:40 p.m.] [08.09.02]
[thank you]

well scholl starts this monday. this is my last offical summer friday night. and i am spending it at home. i am sitting here after getting off work at just about nine. i hadnt talked to anyone, but i did just talk to lindsey. everyone is just going home it seems and nothing is really going on. oh well. i will function better in the morning if i stay here. i just dont want to.

im not ready for school on monday. that is not a sufficent amount of time for a good summer. the new schedualing is gunna be hard to get used to, and even with two hundred more people, we have lost time in lunches. im not prepared for taking french three, after skipping an entire year of the language. im not ready for econimics ither.. i just dont like the sound of that either. the stock market does not interest me at all. both of those classes are ones with a lot of homework, but i think i can manage. then i have the wor;d religions course. that should be pretty interesting. at least it should keep my attention. i have always wanted to learn abolut different religions so i can compare and not take other peoples opinions as my own. and i will have yearbook the last period of the day so that will be my saving grace. i can not wait for that class because i heart the teacher. she is such a sweet heart and it is possible to be sane with her.

so i have been thinking a lot lately. about alot. about jeremy, and guys, and love, and dreams, and college, and guys, and school, and life, and ... guys. eric. jeremy mainly.

i also have been thinking about how often the little things go unnoticed, unappreciated. so i have cahnged my perspective, and even when someone is expected to do something, when it is completed, i thank them. even if it is tideous. but it does matter. everything matters. every little thing needs to be noticed, appreciated, not taken for granted. sometimes we need the gratitude to boost morale. i do that alot at work now. i thank eric all the time. not just him, but he is what started it. he said i never thank him for anything. not in so many words, but still. so that is my good deed to change the world. just sheer kindness and gratitude.

everything else i think about is more elaborate. and i need more time. i will enter again, soon i hope, about all that. goodnight.

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